| My next few blogs will be dedicated to Disney World. We spent six MAGICAL days and five MAGICAL nights wandering around the most MAGICAL place in the world. So here, I present the top five reasons you should drop everything and get on a plane, train, or automobile to Florida RIGHT NOW. |
| No, I’m not talking about the e. coli outbreak at various Taco Bells in 2006. It’s far more serious than that. What I experienced was the excruciating pain that only a broken taco shell can cause as it scraped and tore its way down my esophagus, wreaking havoc from mouth to belly. |
It still hurts to swallow.
(more…)
Belly, I have let you roam again
To Biscuitville, that evil villain.
It tastes so good, and feels so bad.
But it’s the best darn biscuit I ever had–
aside from grandma’s.
———-
Belly, you poke over my pants.
You assert your authority better than fire ants.
How can my mind be ruled by you?
How can my will be so consumed?
You are not so insurmountable,
But by myself, I’m incapable.
———–
Will I sit by and let the scale creep up?
Or will I let the Lord fill my cup?
Must my sides jut out like this?
Or will I rule with an iron fist?
Rolls of fat, be gone with you!
To Thy Word I must be true.
God, please come and rescue me.
From temptation I will flee.
I took some time off from work and other responsibilities last week, including blogging. I wouldn’t exactly call it a vacation though. I’ve been so twisted up inside, I was never really able to unwind, and then the week was over. I was reminded on Wednesday, after my mind shut up for long enough, that I am God’s girl and not anyone or anything else’s. So whatever job God has me doing, wherever He has me serving, I am ultimately serving Him and His purpose. The only approval I should need is from Him. It’s hard to remember that when I’m in the trenches, but a good twice daily dose of the Truth helps keep my mind in line. So, here I am again.
Also, my dad had to get a heart catheterization on Friday, so that was pretty stressful. What we found out was perplexing, and something only God could have done. He is 100% blocked in two places, and a third place looks suspicious. Stents were out of the question because of the locations and amount of blockage. However, God had made His own little “natural bypasses” around the blockages. The doctors said this was very rare but not unheard of. If this had not happened, Dad would have probably had a heart attack long ago. The prognosis is “wait and see.” Whatever that means. My belief is that God will continue to construct His own bypasses so that 100% of the bloodflow is restored and my dad becomes pain-free. Or, that God will just make those freaking blockages disappear altogether. That’d be pretty awesome.
The post-caffeine crash was a non-event. I got a little nauseous and pretty jittery, but I had some food and then I was okay. Slept really well last night too, and no hangover this morning 
Sorry for the short post. I’m counting yesterday’s post toward my 2-post-a-week challenge.
|
I usually pride myself on being caffeine-free. I drink tea, decaffeinated when I’m at home. I drink diet orange soda. I drink water.
Well, pride goeth before the fall. This morning I had 44 OUNCES of diet coke. In 7-up terms, that’s the SUPER GULP. |
Now it’s 2:26 p.m. and I am just getting bouncier. I feel like that Animal House kitty on crack! This stuff is better than…well, my brain won’t sit still long enough to think of what it’s better than!
Why did I denounce caffeine in the past? What was I thinking?? I have been more productive today than in an entire week of non-caffeine!
Caffeine is the GREATEST THING EVER!
….
Okay. I just read up on what wikipedia says about caffeine. I think I’m intoxicated. Check this out.
I am not looking forward to the upcoming crash. This could be bad. I’ll report on the fallout tomorrow.
I was sitting with one of my best friends, musing about how we’ll all be celebrating our 7th anniversaries in 2008, and it struck me that my marriage has just been getting better every year. We’re committed to each other, and we’ve found out that we really meant it when we said “I do.”
One of the many things marriage has taught me is that the definition of “intimacy” extends waaay beyond sex. Actually, being intimate with my husband means knowing every little detail about him, getting to the point of anticipating his thoughts and actions, and learning his routines.
However, one thing that I wish we knew less about each other is our…ahem…bodily functions. And believe, me, even with only two of us in the house, we have a surprisingly large, umm, quantity of them. There’s probably a direct correlation between that and the amount of Mexican food we eat.
I took the liberty of creating a graphical depiction of our conversation topics, and it looks something like this:
As you can see, discussion of sex rates even below finances and household activities. But to be honest, sex doesn’t usually require a whole lot of conversation. You would think that going to the bathroom wouldn’t, either, but there you are. It’s WAY more exciting to talk about the fact that the Chinese food I ate is now out of my body 2 hours later, than to talk about, say, doing the dishes, or how Martin Luther revolutionized Christianity.
I just can’t wait until we have a child. Think about all the poo we’ll be discussing THEN!
Except for the kitty litter part.
And the screaming at 4:30 in the morning part. Seriously, I don’t know what was wrong with my cat last night, but she had this driving need to wake us up every three hours to tell us how much she loved us. In very, very loud expressions of cat-ness.
If I could teach my cat to do this, all would be well. Except of course, I would also have to teach her to USE the toilet before flushing it 500 times.
Edit: Believe it or not, there is exhaustive literature out there on how to toilet train your cat. Check this out.
I just want to say…
I’ve been out of town every weekend for a month. I need some church lovin’. 
That is all. I will see you on Sunday and I’ma hug everybody in the place.